strange and unusual

If I don't write at least something every day, I tend to get lazy. Doing this is part of my overall sense of completion, as it helps set a daily precedent for getting shit done. I realize it's just me talking to myself on the internet, but it helps. With that said, here's my Saturday night:

Listening:



Reading:




Watching:

It's too late.

Can't sleep for the life of me. Still, it's comforting to know that despite all the artsy-fartsy Godspeed You! Black Emperor-type bands I listen to while doing other things, I can still put on a band like Poison Idea and love every second of it.




Hopefully that will never change.

The Second Annual Report

Since writing solely about movies was getting boring, I started another blog for more personal stuff. Rants, recommendations, funny/horrible stories, outpourings from a man at the end of his rope. You get the idea. Happy reading!

Cell phone destroyed? Verizon cares not.

While looking for the receipt for my new cell phone so I can turn in the rebate and have some money to eat this week, I started flipping through the six-page service agreement that came with it. Everything looks straightforward until I get to the part about Payment Exclusions. Turns out my carrier really , really hates giving out new phones to any stranger on the street that also happens to have a binding service contract with them. Here's an excerpt from part three of said contract, Exclusions. Contract-speak is in italics:

We will not pay for Loss caused directly or indirectly by any of the following. Such Loss is excluded regardless of any other cause or event that contributes concurrently or in any sequence to the loss.

1. Nuclear Hazard, meaning any weapon employing atomic fission or fusion; or nuclear reaction or radiation or radioactive contamination from any other cause.

So if you walk into, say, a Verizon Wireless store, and tell them you need a new phone because your country was just nuked and you left it in your house, the ruins of which sit neatly inside the blast radius of the average nuclear missile, you'll likely be met with nothing but guffaws at your terrible plight/excuse, and a resounding "No." That's just not the way we do things in this country. Sucks to be you, Highly Irradiated Man Who Probably Just Gave Me Cancer.

But oh, how the tables will turn when the U.S. goes shithouse in the next few years due to massive civil unrest. What's that, Verizon employee? You lost your phone to one of the local militia demanding to be quartered in your house? Bummerrrrrrr...

2. War, including undeclared or civil war, warlike action by a military force, including action in hindering or defending against an actual or expected attack, by any government, sovereign or other authority using military personnel or other agents; or insurrections, rebellion, terrorism, revolution, usurped power of action taken by government authority in hindering or defending against any of these.

I'll stop here because the rest of the contract is actually plausible, i.e fraud, damage, normal wear and tear, etc. I just wanted to show you the first two(completely implausible) circumstances that came to mind in the Verizon board room when they were drawing up this legally binding agreement. Good lord.